Hey there, it's been a long while. My computer was broken and I got into the lazy aspect of doing most of my computing from my iPod Touch. That thing is so damn cool. But however, I knew I had to get my laptop back up and running as I needed to start updating all my blogs again. Slowly I have. And the good thing about dropping out for a while is the fact that stories can build up and develop so that when the time comes to transcribe it to a blog, it is beefy and has some dimension to it. Being that this is a blog about dating, in New York City no less, I have much to tell. Let's start from right where I left off...
So I finally hooked up with Magnum Irish guy. If you read the earlier post, you know that he was totally hung and we couldn't hook up at first because neither one of us had any protection. But then the time came where we ended up back at his place yet another drunken late night and this time we both were prepared. Now after this kind of build up regarding his size, let me tell you that the sex was mediocre at best. It would have been disappointing had I been expecting anything great from this drunken idiot. But then the story gets even better.
So he then proceeds to tell me just how much sex he'd been having lately, and he was hooking up left and right all over the place. "Gee dude," I thought, "not quite the sweetest pillow talk, don't you think?" And he's going on and on about how much of a stud he is and at this point I thanked god I had the good sense to use PROTECTION with this motherfucker and I just wanted him to shut up so I could fall asleep and wake up tomorrow afternoon and sneak out.
He then proceeds to describe this one girl he works with that he swears wants to ride him good and he tells me that she's looking to have a threesome.
Did he just drop the threesome bomb?!?!
He shows me a picture of her and asks me "She's hot, right?" Oh god...
Needless to say I got him to finally shut up and go to sleep--or pass out rather--and just as I wanted, I woke up in the afternoon and left him still passed out, sneaking out with shoes and coat in arms, high tailing it past his roommate having coffee and reading The New York Times.
I hadn't seen or heard from him for like a week or two, but then I ran into him late night again and he was unbelievably, ridiculously, incredibly hammered. In fact, Thor broke the hammer over this dude's backside. He walks up to me and I can barely make out what he's saying and even the Irish bartender was like, "Dude, he drinks too much." Wow, you think?!?! After much embarrassing chatter with this idiot, the next thing I can make out that comes out of his mouth is, "You're coming home with me."
"No I'm not." I said. And I sure as hell meant it. He then gets on his phone and starts speaking to some other girl then tries to put me on the phone with her so that we can talk about....you guessed it, a threesome. I was so over it at that point that I just pushed him away from me and told him to go home. I have not really spoken to him much after that again. We still run into each other sometimes and I give a polite "Hi." and keep it moving. I have no intention of having any kind of deeper relationship with him other than that.
Now, there are two things that I do NOT do. One is the late night booty call. I never have, and I never will. I sure as hell have slept with a guy when we first met, but that is the open door for him to call me--at a reasonable hour mind you--and ask me to hang out with him. If he just starts calling me at times after 11 pm for nothing other than sex, it's never going to happen between us again. If he calls and wants to treat me like a human being, then yes, we can hang and hook up and do all kinds of things together.
The second thing that I do NOT do is threesomes. I am too damn old for that bullshit, period.
The next story after this one soon to follow. I'll give you a moment to digest this one.
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